Undying thoughts

It’s been awhile.

It’s 1.32am here in Singapore. And well, I can’t seem to sleep. I should stop watching Korean dramas at night, cos then my mind will keep thinking and won’t let me sleep. :<

Anyway, I guess it's been awhile since I've blogged. So I though I'd try I now since I have too many thoughts swimming in my head.

I've been thinking. (THANK God I haven’t stopped thinking.)
How scary it all is.

It’s been awhile since I’ve left school. Yes, 2 weeks is ‘awhile’ for me and I’ll explain why.

Looking at the calendar can be the most thought-provoking yet horrifying activity of my day, cos it just shows how much of my days that I’ve kinda, well, wasted.

So I guess I’m making a point that tomorrow is my New Day. The start of a new season in my life, where I’m gonna hold God so close, cos there’s nothing left for me to hold on to. It’s all so scary to be living in absolute uncertainty, that I kinda miss the routines I used to have. They were sure. Definite. Yet not altogether stable. (In contradicting myself. I’m sorry)

There’s nothing for me to hold on to. But where there’s freedom from, there’s freedom to. Now that I’m free from all the demands and strivings of life, I’m free to jump into the plan that God has for me. I’m no longer bound by chains of constant demands and expectations but I can now be the daughter of God that He wants me to be. It’s my job to step into it right?

I shouldn’t be a afraid. But I guess I am.
Starting is always the hardest part of the process. But once I start by bringing Jesus into the boat, I’ll find myself immediately at my destination. Just like His disciples. That’s my faith picture.

You, reading this probably don’t know what in talking about. But I guess you don’t need to comprehend it, I just need to straighten out my thoughts. Thanks for reading nevertheless.

I do hope I can get some sleep soon.


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